Life in the Slow Lane

At 1:00 in the afternoon it looks sunny and as warm as today is going to get. Weather.com says it has warmed all the way up to 26 degrees (although it feels 10 degrees cooler), it must be time for my bike ride. For the first stage of my work out, I wrestle my bike out of the solidified snow bank. Then I bang enough ice free that my wheels can move. I don't bother taking all of the icicles off, though. People pay good money to add noisemakers to their spokes. Today I get mine for free. The icicles and I bicycle five and a half miles together. The more we hang out, the more we have in common. I think the "wintry mix" is probably responsible for these icicles, too. 

More snow today. Can I prevail upon you all to bless the name of my hard-working SOS? Not only did he shovel out our car, but he also cleaned up the too-quick job of the university snow plow from our door to our car. All the other sidewalks are nightmares of ice. But I've got better than a red carpet walk from door to door.

Today is the kind of day that makes living in Wintery Wisconsin sound fun. Family snow day, anyone? Impenetrable snow fort Or maybe not. (Note: Limp child in background is merely sleeping.) Do all Wisconsin babies sleep through snow sledding? Yay for warm layers that allow for smiles on SmilesBabyGirl!

Laundry Day. In which we learn that snow with a stiff wind behind it is not a fun time to be outside. The path to trod to the laundry room. Mid-storm

Tomorrow's forecast calls for "wintry mix." Is it just me or does that sound like a cheap knock off of Starbucks Christmas Blend?

I'm not sure what Winter in Wisconsin was like for these four days, but let me tell you that this winter in Ohio was lovely. Every day I walked at least a block in flip flops and coat-free. And the best part? The sun didn't set until nearly 5:30! That's the life, folks.

Today we are driving all.day.long. The good part about having so many days that are not really fit for outdoor play is that we've discovered a number of ways to occupy many hours without stirring from our seats. For instance, today's entertainment includes  Curious George Flies a Kite which we listened to approximately ten times between Madison and Chicago... and that was just the first third of our drive.

Tomorrow is the official first day of winter. See how efficient we are here on Living in the Snow Lane? We've already gotten in more than a month of winter weather. Ironically, it is the first day of winter that we are fleeing Wisconsin. We're bound to Ohio for the next few days, where I hear it is warmer. I'm cool with that.

Today I tricked manipulated   convinced suggested that SOS fill the gas tank, saving me a trip later in the week. In observing his loving service on my behalf, I am glad to notice that I am not the only one who has not yet figured out the art of staying warm while pumping gas in winter.

Ah. Saturday morning. A perfect day for staying toasty in pajamas until lunch time. Poor SOS had to go proctor a final for his undergrad students at 7:00 in 18 degrees. I'm not sure who I feel more sorry for... SOS or the students. Who schedules finals for a Saturday?

I confess I've gone a little overboard on Christmas gifts for the kids this year. Not so much as to bury the tree, but it is a little on the impressive side. I can't remember if I've ever gotten Christmas presents for the kids before this year (that's what grandparents, aunts and uncles, and friends cleaning out their kids' closets are for). But this year I'm extra motivated. Most of the gifts I got this year for the kids are actually sanity gifts for me: inside games and activities, books, kid-sized trampoline that fits perfectly in front of our fire escape... It's all to preserve my sanity. Just don't tell the kids.

I've been trying to make it out on my bike every day that SOS is home and the weather is even the least bit agreeable. I've taken to trying to mark out how far I get before I am warm enough and the endorphins kick in so that I am glad I made the effort. Today it never happened. The wind coming off the partially frozen lake was my undoing. I was so very tempted to stop at a bus stop and let the bus bring me and my frozen self all the way home. But if I do that once, won't it be all the more tempting to do that every other day?

I totally get the old, scary fairy tales about woods now. When the wind really starts up, it rattles the bare bones of the trees in the wood near our place so much that it creates a roar. It took me several days of hearing the noise before I realized what it was.  Any day now, I'll look over to the woods and see Hansel and Gretel escaping with their lives.

Today CutieLittleBoy stood at the kitchen window and looked out on the sunshiny day. "It looks like a hot day," he said. And he was right. It did look like a warm summer day. Then I opened the triple pained window and let a cooling blast of air into our cozy kitchen. (Have I mentioned yet that the cost of heating our apartment is included in our rent? Best. Deal. Ever.) I took no pleasure in proving that looks can be deceiving.

Weather.com and I are new buddies. I think it is quite likely that I have checked the weather forecast more times in the last two months than I have in all of my life previous. Recently, every time I visit my new friend, I see headlines about this crazy winter we're having, where some places are unseasonably warm and others are unseasonably cold. Whenever they show the map, there is a great big swoop differentiating the two climate zones. I'm fairly certain the swoop goes directly over my head. There's no doubt around here in anyone's mind that we're experiencing a mild winter. As someone recently pointed out to me, I haven't stepped outside only to feel every last particle of moisture in my nose freeze. Can we all just sing a little praise chorus about that?

Today it rained and rained and rained. In Church today, they announced that since it definitely has not felt very Christmasy with the weather (apparently I'm alone here in my assessment that fogginess brings on Christmas cheer), next Sunday everyone is encouraged to wear Christmas sweaters... Ha! And they told me this was a nut-free church. (Okay, so the context was regarding snacks, not sweaters.)

We've had several foggy, foggy days this week. This is the kind of winter I knew in Central California. Finally, I am beginning to think Christmas may be on its way after all.

Christmas is two weeks away and I'm completely surprised by how few houses are decorated. Maybe in Southern California everyone has to convince themselves that it is Christmas time by tripling their electric bill and here in Madison [usually] the snow makes it look all Christmasy starting in October.

In all honesty, I might not be able to call the last few days winter. Of course it is still cold-ish, but  fun afternoons at the park only ended by the sunset!

Now that all of the leaves are gone from the trees, our favorite thing to say to each other when we are out and about in the car is "Hey, did you know that [house/lake/building/path] was there?" The biggest surprise: I might actually be able to see real lake water from my kitchen window.

Today we went outside to fly a homemade kite. We didn't have great success with the kite, but I consider the fact we got out a huge success. Another success to be noted: Apparently, BabyMyBoy likes sleeping in his snow suit. Best daytime nap he's had so far.

On a foggy winter morning, I wonder exactly how far north Wisconsin is. Why is it still dark at 7:30? I didn't realize that the sun's winter hours only required it to clock in at 7:15 and clock out nine hours later. At least there is no lunch break for it (usually).

Last night SOS and I were talking about the gorgeous days we've been having. Yes, it hasn't made it much above 40 degrees, but we've had sun! and minimal wind! Thus, we decided that it was an excellent idea to plan a hike and a picnic after church. The day started gloomier than we had expected, but it was still going to be warm, right? We dressed a little optimistically. After church someone in the row behind us struck up a conversation and when we mentioned our lunch plans, he agreed that we were having a lovely, mild November. It is the nicest November he ever remembers! I mean, last year, there was only one day in November that ever made it above freezing. He didn't think there had been much picnicking last year. So a few minutes later, we were on our way. Let me stop here and comment on a few other times when we've been a little over-ambitious and under-prepared for lengthy walks: h iking an island with almost no food and water. Searching for a na

It might surprise you to know that I use MapMyRide to keep track of the mileage I travel on my bike rides. It might surprise you because I never publish my workouts on Facebook or here on this blog. That's because I am ridiculously slow. (Yes, I've been passed by runners.) Part of that is a function of using a one speed beach cruiser. Part of it is because it took me until I was 32 to find an exercise I could enjoy. But lately, I've been entertaining the idea of posting my bike rides for all to see. Not to let everyone marvel at my athletic prowess, but to say "It's 27 degrees outside and I chose to go out in it." Then of course, everyone will leave lots of comments saying how awesome I am. I just need to see whether the MapMyRide people would consider adding an option to log the outside temperature alongside the miles traveled.

I've experienced quite a bit of the famous Midwestern friendliness since moving to Wisconsin, but curiously, I find it distinctly lacking when I'm riding my bike. No one nods. No one returns my smile or my mouthed good morning/afternoon . No one calls out they are coming when they pass from behind me. (Yes, I'm slow.) What's wrong? Is my winter riding gear really that frightful?  I'm not even wearing a ski mask. (Yet.)

Let's play a game. Let's play "Guess Which Apartment Has Their Heat On."

It is snowing again. So of course tonight was the night to go pick out our Christmas tree because that is how it always is in the movies. Besides, I learned recently that when it snows, it actually means it is warm. Friends of ours were sharing about being at a football game and being glad that it was snowing on them because it was a warm snow. So many preconceived ideas to rewrite. And not just me. Every time we talk about it snowing, CutieLittleBoy says it means that it must be almost Christmas time. That's fine for now, but what do we say in March when it finally gets warm enough to snow again?

Freezing Rain. That's a new one. The myth about 35 ways to say "snow" in Eskimo aside, I thought there was a pretty straight forward classification of precipitation. Rain, snow. And then that aberration called hail when the clouds are cold and the water molecules decide to dance a little bit of disco before the clouds let them drop. But today, we start out with freezing rain and then as it warmed up , we got hail. And then as it warms up more  later today, we're supposed to get snow. I feel like Obelix taping my head, saying, Toc, toc, toc. These Romans are crazy.

There is still so much to learn... like there is a different definition of perishables. I could have left the milk in the car all night... instead, it was the pineapple that suffered.

It's Black Friday in the rest of the world, but there is still a good deal of white in our Friday. SOS promises he can handle all three kids and sends me out once darkness falls to take advantage of Black Friday deals. The best one, of course, is getting to go out all by myself. I try to ignore the crunching, snapping sound of breaking ice as I pull on the car door handle. Halfway through the night I buy myself an Icee because if I'm going to be suffering a cold headache, I might as well be making my sweet tooth happy.

Surely the best part of living in a region with a real winter is you don't need to buy a second fridge just to host Thanksgiving dinner. And a close second is this: when your apartment approaches 450 degrees along with your oven, it is very easy to cool it down. But not too far down the list you will surely find that when you take the children on a morning walk and one of them slips getting both muddy and bloody, ice packs are as nearby as the closest snow bank.

A few weeks ago, a new acquaintance told me about "The Day" which happens every spring. "The Day" is the first day of the year where temperatures reach higher than 40 degrees. On this day, everyone goes outside to enjoy the warmth, wearing short sleeves. She laughed about how 40 degrees seems so warm after making it through the winter. Friends, today was above 40 degrees, and it was most assuredly not "The Day." At 4:30 when I raced the sun to our finish lines, I learned the important truth that a wet bicycle seat seems much colder than a frozen bicycle seat. Note to Self: When "The Day" comes, take a towel to dry off my seat before hitting the road. This is what 40 degrees looks like when you take a photo from a moving bicycle at dusk with a flip phone.

A warming trend! The snow has begun to melt and during the warmest part of the day, the eaves drip as if it is pouring rain. I wear three layers and flip flops to run errands and then we take a family night-time walk to enjoy the gorgeous moon. We play a game of ice soccer along the way.

I had really, really wanted to get a family photo for our Christmas card over the weekend. Yes, I made everyone stand out in the frigid wind to accomplish this. This is what 24 degrees looks like. Not quite what I had imagined... I had chosen our outfits so carefully! I'm still perfecting my cold weather biking attire. And then, it being sunny and all, I went for a bike ride. Yes, I nearly broke a fingernail trying to chip the ice off of my seat before sitting down. My bike during the snow fall. Fortunately, I still bike slowly enough that the ice and snow on my handle bars did not dramatically increase the wind chill factor.

On the third day of winter, it snowed and snowed. We got 4.5 inches of snow. Communities an hour south of us had 17 inches. SOS and CutieLittleBoy played out in it all morning while the rest of us stayed inside and listened to Curious George Goes to the Hospital five times. When the snow stopped and the roads were cleared, SOS and the kids unburied the car and then we all bundled up and drove to a coffee shop for hot drinks to celebrate.

On the second day of winter, it began snowing in earnest as soon as darkness fell. SOS ran the children outside to make mini-snowballs and have snow land on their tongues. I took photos from the safety of my bedroom window. And filmed first impressions when they returned.

On the first day of winter, a blustery wind all morning long ushered in snow flurries for the early afternoon. Before those snow flurries appeared, we made it a total of five minutes out at the park. I say "a total of" because during those five minutes, we came back inside once to put on coats because the children had not believed me when I said they needed to put on coats. The coats were insufficient. So the rest of the day we stayed inside where we keep the thermostat at 72.

(Note: This is completely tongue-in-cheek.) Everyone is always talking about the importance of being a Proverbs 31 Woman. It's a pretty hefty list of expectations for anyone to follow, so I've decided to start small and work on just one verse at a time. This year, I'm working on Proverbs 31:21 which says, " She is not afraid of snow for her household,  for all her household are clothed in  scarlet. " Go Badgers!

Left to Right: SmilesBabyGirl, BabyMyBoy, and CutieLittleBoy

Today with the sunset, I see a flock of geese on their migration south. Say "hello" to Southern California for me when you get there, I think. I can't help but think of the geese that regularly flew over our house as they made the arduous migration from the golf course just north of us to the shores of the yacht club just south of us like retirees who have no fear of their pension running low. I idly wonder whether these Wisconsin geese will ever return to these northern climes or if, like the geese I knew, they will take up residence on the carefully greened lawn of the golf course. I wouldn't blame them. Learning to live rent free in Southern California is no small magic. The last month has been gorgeous winter weather by Southern California's standards. Aside from the torrential rain and the thunder storms so close we can hear the lightening sizzle as it strikes, it's been pretty much the same. The leaves started changing color the first week of Septe

On the eve of my birthday, I've been informed that if this MBA adventure doesn't work out for our family, I could always get a job as a professional packer. I'd like to think this is a compliment, but I'm not sure. One thing is for sure, though, we've astounded people all along our travels. From the very first forklift driver who loaded our container on the back of his flatbed all the while trying to keep his forklift from toppling, to the moving company who helped us unload that same container today, we've gotten a nod or two of respect for how well we've packed. Our Relocube safely stowed, no forklifts were seriously injured in the process. And it isn't just with the Relocube. There is that small detail of our 87 pound suitcase that we (and by that I mean SOS) lugged in and out of cars, up and down stairs, on and off trains all before realizing that it weighed in as it did. That's one advantage of traveling without checking luggage. Only o

When SOS and I were first married, we lived in what we called our Honeymoon House. The Honeymoon House backed onto a golf course. It had four bedrooms, three and a half bathrooms, and a gorgeous view of a mountain we secretly claimed for ourselves. The view from the front porch of our Honeymoon House. The dark shadow on the right stretching toward the moon is our mountain. Of course we owned no furniture when we moved in. We each came from renting fully furnished rooms and so moved in with a borrowed mini-fridge, a borrowed air mattress, and all of our still-wrapped wedding gifts... and there were lots of those. So many in fact, that we gave them the extra bedrooms. We were in that uncertain waiting game called "short sale" both of the condo we came to know as home and of the Honeymoon House. The owner of the Honeymoon House wasn't thrilled with the idea of an empty house for however many months the bureaucracy shuffled papers. As long as we didn't mind realt

Tonight is our last night in the place we've called home for six years. In honor of the occasion, here are six thoughts on selling our condo and moving on: 1) When we first talked about selling our tiny castle, I daydreamed about papering the house with post-it notes urging kind thoughts from the seller regarding the various quirks of a dearly beloved space. Like a note to the teacher of a child being sent off for a first day of kindergarten, I wanted to make sure no one misunderstood the charming idiosyncrasies to be annoying vices. As escrow drags on, I've come to suspect that no one could love this place as much as we have. With the help of the kids, the house has been worn until it has become real. The buyer will think it needs new paint and carpet, we know better. Maybe tonight while we sleep the magic nursery fairy will come and turn our tiny house into a real castle. If only all our boxes packed themselves. Oh, wait. They all do self-pack. 2) A number of comp

Our realtor tells us we should make room in our house so interested buyers can have the room to imagine their lives in this space rather than just ours. Gentle Readers, potential buyers will just have to have excellent imaginations. Oh, to be sure, we are packing as much as we can. We rented a storage unit about the size of our  living room, and we keep adding to it car load by car load.  But still, we're a little tight on space and as much as we will love the person who decides to pay our price, we don't have any room to accommodate their imagination in our square footage. Well, with one exception... we have decided to move out the pet snake. A reptile such as this could potentially swallow whole many a potential buyer's imagination. Meanwhile, we've been working on some phrasing to use in the property listing. Some of my favorites include: 1) A bathroom as big as a kitchen! 2) The closets, cupboards, and pantry are all ready to showcase your unique s

It's been one of those months. Maybe you've had one. Or it had you. Briefly, in April we Found out SOS was accepted to grad school and they wanted to see him in person two weeks later. Planned and executed a last minute trip for each of us (two different destinations), one requiring the acquisition of new formal wear. Moved storage facilities. Owed taxes for the first time ever. Broke into a house (with owner's permission). Survived a round of flu... and a nasty cold. Celebrated 6 years of marriage (hugging the toilet, no alcohol involved). Celebrated a birthday (hugging the toilet, no alcohol involved). Enjoyed visits from both sets of parents. Acknowledged our car was officially too far gone when it failed to change gears in traffic. Researched and purchased a new car. Learned that a case that has haunted us for nearly three years was settled. Discovered that the girl we were expecting is actually a boy. Listed our house for sale. Were offered a TA pos

Gentle Readers, it appears I will have to learn how to Do Winter. I've never had to, up till now. For nine years, I lived in the tropics... things get cold when temperatures drop to 60 degrees. For thirteen years, I've lived in Southern California. I own eight pairs of flip-flops... and two pairs of shoes that have both a closed-toe and an enclosed heel. Flip-Flops. A good choice for every season. Right? The other years? Those are the coldest I've ever known. It snowed once when I was in high school. We got about an inch of snow during the night and it melted almost completely by 10 am. The important part of that day, though, was that school was cancelled on account of it. But aside from the rare coincidence of cold and humidity arriving on the same day, my years in Central California were marked by a long-standing inability to believe that there existed temperatures colder than 60 degrees. I remember standing on the blacktop during the gray winter days of second g

He stretched. What happens next is shocking. While the boss was away, THIS happened. Wait till you see what happens at 24:31. Totally worth the time!! You won't believe the shady pedigree on this guy. Have lasting success following these 10 simple rules. What this 12 year old does will blow your mind. What this guy did with 5 loaves of organic bread = Epic. Worst Fashion Fail EVAR One new superfood you won't believe. He increased his wealth using one simple weird trick. It is really way, way too easy. After all, there isn't just scandal in the Bible... scandal got invented in the Bible. There aren't just amazing, surprising outcomes... there are miracles . And there aren't just good tips for self-improvement... there are the basic rules for life. But still, I'm glad that my Bible has normal tell-all subheadings rather than clickbait headlines. Aren't you?

CutieLittleBoy is firmly situated in the middle of the Why Phase. I am pretty well convinced that he asks the question so frequently that he doesn't always hear it himself. It is his verbal pause of choice. And then every once in awhile he throws me for a loop by expecting me to answer and repeating the question again and again until I come up with a suitable answer. And for some reason, the size of our house has come up in his endless questions. "Why do we have a big house? Why is our kitchen small? Why do we have lots of things? Why do we have a small house? Why do we have lots of things in our kitchen?" In between scrambling for answers, I wonder what prompts the adjectives. What is he seeing that makes it big or small, full or empty? I don't know why it surprises me, though. From day to day I find myself asking similar questions. "How can we keep living in such a small place? Why did I ever think we might one day need to move to something larger?" Fr

Ever have those weeks where each day holds something semi-significant? It's a storyteller's pet peeve. Something interesting happens, and in the midst of working it into an entertaining story, some other unusual event occurs. It's unrelated but still noteworthy. The story teller can't quite connect the events meaningfully, but to tell one story and not the other... That's what these past few days have been for me. A break-in, an escape. A near tragedy, a dramatic recovery. A stirring of a long-forgotten passion, and a surprising absence of one. Not a one is connected to another. The volume has been turned up. Or the picture just came into focus. Something must have happened to bring these all together right on top of each other. And surely, if I just listen a little harder or look a little closer, I'll find the pieces that make it all come together in a proper story. But how do you connect the careful calculation of an active thief (it appears the item o