New Resolutions for a New Year

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Friends, countrymen, and far-flung family... Today it is my privilege to publish for you, in traditional slowlane fashion, resolutions for your new year. I realize that this is now the fourth of January and you have four fewer days to fulfill these resolutions (does it make you feel better or worse that I started this list several days before the turn of the year?) but I have endeavored to make them achievable so that you will all come back next year (and I promise that next year won't have the same recurring theme).

1. Using your knowledge of architectural design, draft a blueprint for how you could comfortably install a tropical cruise into your cubicle.
2. Wear a hole in the toe of your sock, and wear it proudly! (Okay, the proudly part isn't necessary.)
3. Plan a weekend with no plans (and then send it in the mail to me).
4. Come up with a better wedding thank-you note generator than this one. (Try it! It is almost as fun as Mad Libs.)
5. Promise to buy a copy of the riveting memoirs (yet to be published) entitled Slowlane Goes Bridezilla.
6. Learn a new dance step (the one you do when something tumbles out of the refrigerator is acceptable, but it has to be one you've never done before).
7. Borrow somebody else's kids for a trip to the zoo.
8. Plan a meal around the color green... the use of food coloring is acceptable.
9. Write an ooey-gooey love letter to your sweetheart and send it in the mail.
10. Travel to Calabasas the first week in April. It should be beautiful that time of year.

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