There's Still More in Lemoore

So after much thought on solving the world's problems, I have arrived at a solution for ending the evil of gambling. (If you aren't yet convinced that gambling is evil, let me try my fool proof argument out on you...something that lures millions of people into the middle of nowhere HAS to be evil. Right? Of course right!)

The solution:
The Personal Guaranteed Wins Slot Machine!

This is how it works:
The interested party inserts money into the machine and chooses a selection of numbers. If those numbers coincides with the computer generated random number, the party wins. If the numbers do not match up, the money simply stays in the machine and allows for a much bigger win in the future.

Isn't this a great plan? That way, you aren't giving your money to some stranger who is likely to spend it on a car that will get reposessed plus you don't have to feel guilty about throwing your money away because you will eventually get the money back. Think of it as "Vegas meets piggy bank."

I see great potential for this idea, but I suspect that it would only prompt the casinos down the road to proclaim "There really and truly is still more in Lemoore, believe us, okay?"

Although, that wouldn't fit very well on a billboard.