Excellence Me

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Recently a writer from an African country has been providing a great deal of merriment at my desk. He has taken to writing quite frequently, and at great length, addressing emails to "Excellence [my name]" and requesting things like the entire staff directory, photographs of me sent by DHL Express, and letters so he and his several children can obtain visas to come and see Excellence Me.

I have told him "no" in as many ways I can think of, without actually using the words "no" and he still writes to Excellence Me, assured beyond any reasonable doubt that I will promptly reply with the documentation needed for visas. "The door is steal open", he writes.

How comforting.

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