Shower Drain

Three showers in as many weeks.

Not the water kind, the oodles and oodles of gifts kind.

The kind where your mouth cramps from saying "Oh how Cute!" for every onesie, printed burp cloth, and tiny overalls. And the kind where you see what would be a matter for embarrassment if it hadn't just come out of a box in the presence of cooing women.

At one shower I had the privilege of sitting next to a woman from Great Britain. She switched out the typical "How cute!" for "That's just adorable!" But she made sure to say it at least three or four times for every gift.

And that is where I got my brilliant idea.

What if at a baby shower, for every time you said "cute" or "adorable", you had to contribute a nickel to the baby's college fund? With 18 years of interest, the baby could attend university debt free. Wouldn't that be a snazzy gift?

I suspect that you would still have the normal crowd of people unwilling to participate in irritating shower games, and others might resent needing to cough up more money after spending money on the gift plus $7.40 for an animated gift bag and $3.20 for a properly pastel card and $1.98 for multi-colored tissue paper and $4.98 for each of three rattles tied as decoration on the gift bag handle, but I think others would much prefer contributing to a college fund than sniffing melted chocolate bars in diapers.

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